My decision is made. I'm going to be an employee again. I'm excited and nervous. The project is high profile and demanding, but very tangible and with a charity whose work I admire and respect. The bit of me that left my last job with my self confidence worn into the ground has been whispering in my ear. But I know these are just thoughts and they will pass.
I'm very proud of everything I've achieved over the past 14 months of self employment. I've proven I can make it work. I also know that it's a world that I will return to. It's been fantastic to lead a different kind of life for a while and is what I will strive for in the future.
However, as a single-ish girl with no-one else to help pay the mortgage, and who's still carrying student debt amongst other things, it's also made me realise how much I'd like to be free of the shackles of those bills, mortgage aside.
So, probably for the first time in my life I've made a decision about my career based on money, as well as opportunity. I want to clear the decks and be financially freer. I want to build a more stable platform for myself and my future. After all, no-one's going to do it for me.
I will return to a life more free and flexible. But for now, security feels important.
I feel very proud and privileged to be in a position where I've worked hard enough that I've had a choice to make, and for the support of those who've helped me get there.
I am going to concentrate my energies on making my life secure enough that I can make more choices without fear. Money can't buy happiness, but for now it can help me buy a future I want.
Congratulations. Onwards and upwards, and so on ...
ReplyDeleteThe huge advantage about having been self employed for 14 months is you now know you have that to fall back on. And that means you don't have to feel trapped by any new job you go into. You are free to take it, run with it, develop it and challenge the boss(es) at any time.
ReplyDeleteYou don't have to take any shit because you fear losing your job.
And that gives you an immense freedom that most employees never feel.
Wishing you the very best along your new path.
Just don't give up the blogging :)
Congratulations on all kinds of levels! As you know, I am very envious. ;-)
ReplyDeleteThanks All. And, don't worry Kim, I'm sure I'll still have plenty to grumble about here!
ReplyDeleteYou're right, I have found a freedom that I didn't know was possible until I took the risk. I will return to it at some knowing I never have to go back to where I was. Freedom and choice are powerful, and I will never let go of them. The 'portfolio career' is always there.
Stacia, you could think about seeing how you could combine multiple bits of work to make up a whole? It can be very satisfying. And less scary than getting stuck in the wrong place.
Vx
How have you been finding employeedom? Hope you're enjoying it and all it brings outside the office.
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